John Payne ’12
Major: Studio Art
Hometown: Memphis
Sigma Nu Fraternity
Epsilon Sigma Chapter
Please read our Alumni Newsletter, outlining exciting updates in Sigma Nu this semester.
Read the Fall 2009 Newsletter.
Dr. Troutt, President of Rhodes College, has formally accepted our invitation to the 75th Anniversary Celebration and will attend the White Rose Banquet on April 17, 2010.
It is my sad duty to report that Virgil Starks, III, Rhodes College Class of 1985, passed away Saturday, November 8, 2008. He died of cardiac arrest while driving to his home following Auburn’s football game. At the time of his death, Virgil served as the Senior Associate Athletic Director at Auburn University. Click here to see the announcement on Auburn’s Website.
As a student at Rhodes, Virgil was involved in the Kinney program and the Black Student Association. He was a member of Sigma Nu Fraternity. Virgil ran cross country and played on the football squad. As an alumnus, Virgil worked for the Rhodes College Admissions Office as Coordinator for Alumni Recruiting and served a three year term on the Alumni Association Executive Board.
College will not teach you everything, especially when it comes to mastering the behavior of a true gentleman. Read more about some of the conventions Sigma Nus practice that separate us from the average guy.
“I have never allowed my duty as a gentleman to interfere with my pleasure in the slightest degree.”
– Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest
The fact is chivalry is appreciated more than ever before due to the simple fact that is has become a rare quality among guys. Even though we find it comical and maybe even a little necessary to act like children among our fraternity brothers, that does not mean that we should act the same way in front of women — especially when we want to date them. As the old saying goes, boys will be boys.
Unfortunately, there are a growing number of guys who act like barbaric, out of control savages. The problem with these guys behaving in such an unflattering way can be attributed to two important occurrences:
For this reason, most men shy away from the nice guy image. That is not to say that they’re bad guys per se, but they would much rather avoid being labeled “nice.” The sad thing about this is that men are confusing being a nice guy with being a gentleman. Consequently, as the nice guy slowly dies off, so too do the gentlemanly-like qualities that women appreciate so much.
Every day, we witness guys who disrespect women. Some guys whistle at them like hound dogs, others grope women on the dance floor in order to satisfy some sort of human need for physical contact, while other guys curse at women once they realize that they’re being given the cold shoulder.
It is these reckless guys who give the rest of us a bad reputation and make it more difficult for us to interact with women. It’s not surprising that a woman says, “Get lost jerk!” when you say, “Hi.” She has likely been disrespected by a few drooling men by the time we come along.
Of course, Sigma Nu knows better. We are aware that being a perfect gentleman will not hinder our chances of seducing beautiful women. Au contraire; for women, it is like a breath of fresh air.
Acting like the perfect gentleman doesn’t involve letting women walk all over us, putting anyone else above being a man, or even being a nice guy. The definition of being a gentleman means that we must treat all women with equal respect in order to achieve our ultimate desire.
In the old days, men were noble because they believed that women were inferior and fragile, and thus such righteous acts were necessary. Fortunately, women have made it pretty clear that they don’t need our charity and they’d very much like to be treated as equals. So why are we chivalrous if there is absolutely nothing to gain from it?
The most important rule when it comes to acting like a perfect gentleman is that you do so with all women. By being a perfect gentleman with all the ladies, we convince the ones we are attracted to that our own kind gestures come with good intentions and not ulterior motives. And in order to be perceived as a gentleman, Sigma Nus continue to display such behavior at all times.
Do not get angry
Every time we get angry, we show the women around us that we don’t have a handle on our emotions. We must preserve composure and avoid swearing at all costs.
Always be courteous
Whether or not we succeed in getting the digits, it is important for us to always be polite.
Do not stare
It’s definitely not okay to gawk at a woman all night long and then turn to our fraternity brothers and laugh while we all high-five one another. If we stare at a woman for too long, we will end up intimidating or frightening her.
Do not interrupt
We let a woman finish what she has to say without interrupting. Of course, this is easier said than done. Women love to hear interesting things — especially if they involve gossip or flattery.
Do not spit
A lot of men have the atrocious habit of spitting without realizing how unsophisticated and disgusting it is. Spitting is not an attractive behavior in men and should not be done. The only people who have the option of spitting are women.
Always open doors
This is the oldest and most basic rule of male etiquette: Always open doors for women. So if it swings and has hinges, we open it. For one reason or another, women appreciate this gesture — even though they can easily do the act themselves. It makes them feel special, kind of like putting the toilet seat down once we are finished.
Offer Our Seat
Women love chivalry and nothing says we’re gentleman more than the act of offering our own seat when no others are available.
Give her our arm
A true gentleman takes a woman’s arm and escorts her over an obstacle-filled crossing (i.e. uneven ground, icy surfaces).
“Can I get you something?”
Women love knowing that men are constantly thinking about their well-being. We do this by asking one simple question: “Can I get you something?”
Remember boys — learn from our examples. The next time you’re surrounded by lovely ladies, or even those who are anything but, use chivalry to seduce their minds and have them view you in a positive light. Open those doors and offer your seat, and before you know it, you’ll be opening up your world.
Interested in becoming a Brother of a top fraternity at Rhodes College? Do you possess skills in academics, athletics, and leadership? If so, you may be an excellent candidate of Sigma Nu Fraternity. Find out more about what Rush is all about!
The third alumni gathering of the summer took place on Saturday, August 11, 2007. In addition to completing the numerous House-related projects started earlier in the summer, attendees signed a petition to create an official Epsilon Sigma Alumni Chapter.
Alumni met at noon on Tuesday, July 17, 2007, at the Fox and Hound English Pub to discuss plans to expand alumni involvement with the Chapter. During this second alumni meeting of the summer, M.L. Gough, Rhodes College Director of Student Activities, presented information on Greek Life at Rhodes, and Brother John Gehrig (ES 1062) provided alumni with an update on the Chapter’s continuing progress.
On June 23-27, 2007, Brothers John Gehrig (ES 1062) and Derek Pegram (ES 1069) connected with Sigma Nu Brothers from around the country at Washington and Lee University, Lexington, VA. During the conference, brothers, along with staffers and alumni, toured Sigma Nu Fraternity Headquarters, VMI, and Washington and Lee University.